If according to tradition the first anniversary gift is paper, the 10th is tin, and the 20th is china, what should the 23rd  be?  Just recently,  my husband and I decided to go with technology. On sale at half price, we gifted ourselves a robot vacuum cleaner that would help with the dust and fur that collects on our great room floor.  While I joked about it being the most unromantic gift we could find, little did I know how that black and silver bot would grow on me, winning over my heart with its can-do attitude and its daily offering of perspective and inspiration.

Each morning at the programmed time, our little bot buddy heads out to work.  It ventures ahead doing its job until it bumps into something. Not in any way deterred, it turns slightly, proceeds, until it bumps again. Bump and slight turn, bump and slight turn, it continues on for hours, eventually traveling around our entire floor. Then, when it begins to run out of power, it takes itself “home” where it rests and recharges, preparing for the next day’s efforts.

My black bot buddy never gets upset, never blames itself or anyone else for its mistakes.  It follows its path, faces an obstacle, slightly adjusts and tries again. It never needs to hide its errors or recoil with embarrassment or shame.  It stays in the moment, adjusting to experience and feedback, not getting hung up on the past or worrying about the future. It rests and recharges, never a sleepless night.  Bump and turn, bump and turn.

What would it be like, I wonder, if I could be more like my roomba?  How would it be if I let myself try, bumping into life’s roadblocks, without the self critical voice or the generalization of one little bump meaning more than it has to.  In fact, the bumping is part of the process, a natural state of going forward without knowing in advance what the journey looks like. If I could view every bump I encounter as guiding feedback, a message for adjustment, how much calmer would I be?  How much less would I worry about my daughters and feel energized instead of stressed?

What a great metaphor for a successful life as well as a successful marriage:  Wake up each day with purpose; let experience be your guide; then go home for rejuvenation.